seven.

I went into my monthly appt for another ultrasound to check on my kidneys and to just do an all over ultrasound of my stomach sides and back to get an idea of why I'm always in so much pain. We found: an ulcer, a kidney infection, hydronephrosis, and a new second tear in my placenta. I broke down crying. Not because I feel bad for myself but because 1. I'm worried for my baby. 2. I know what was coming next. The doctor then came in and put me on a higher dose of pain medication. Although I'm supposed to take it every 6 hrs I don't. I take it when I absolutely feel like I'm dying. It hurts me to know that everything I have is not something that will really go away until the baby is born and I hate that when push comes to shove I have to take that stupid pain pill because I don't want my baby to have that. I do struggle on a daily basis with pain but luckily I have two kids that keep me preoccupied and a husband who takes good care of me when I'm in need. But reality, Pain is starting to get worse as the baby gets bigger. It's tough. I want to enjoy this pregnancy as much as I can, because it will probably be my last. But... It's hard. I'm busy, I'm in pain, and I'm tired. I hope these next couple months fly by. I can feel my blood pressure starting to drop. I had a little passing out incident in Vegas this past weekend due to that. 😞

Now I'm also worried about when my baby is due. she is due the week after my husbands work convention in Vegas. All of my family will be out of town for different reasons and I'm worried I'll go into labor while all of them are gone and I'm 39 weeks along. Do I tag along? Do I stay home? Do I ask my doctor to take me before everyone leaves? But then I'm stuck at home with a newborn and two kids on my own my first week home? Do I chance Jordan not being able to make it back in time for the birth? Do I really wanna drive to Vegas 39 weeks pregnant? Gah! I guess it's time to ask for some opinions especially from my doctor. I feel I have so much to do and so little time but why do the days feel like they go by so slooooow. 

I'm a mess people. 

😁

six [long] months

Usually I have enjoyed my pregnancies, but this one has been a doozie. It's taken a toll on me mentally, physically, and emotionally. But nonetheless, we are so excited for this little angel face to get here.

[6 months]

although I've been 6 months for a couple & a half weeks now, all of a sudden this baby has popped out! I was never this big with Shailee or Ty until about 8 months so this is new to me. 

my stomach compared to my high school brothers 12 pack. mine looks so much better, don't you think?

why this pregnancy has been so long... 

1. it's given me ulcers 

2. i have hydronephrosis on my right kidney

3. i have a kidney infection on my left

4. and i now have a second tear (subchoronic hemmorhage) in my placenta

right?

so.. hubby and i have decided for right now and atleast another 5 years, this will be our last child. We've talked about how one more could be an option maybe later down the road, but i think both of us are scared to actually get anything done. like a vasectomy or tubes tied. It's something that's pretty permanent and we don't want to have any regrets or anymore health problems. i sometimes wonder if this is my bodies way of telling me to be done. It is something we are going to have to pray and think about. 

*baby is the size of a papaya*

length: 13 inches

weight: 1.5 pounds 

p.s. does anyone know how to survive pregnancy in the summer? I have yet to experience that! :(

 

5 months pregnant.

boy or girl: girl.
name: Remi Jane Raby (so far)
cravings: salty and sweet mixed together.
size: baby is the size of an onion.
weight gained: none.

●little girl likes to hang out on my right lower side
●her kicks are getting stronger
●my pants are getting tighter
● at the awkward stage where people cant tell if  im getting fat or pregnant

Ty Paxton Raby {a birthing story}

My little man finally came! And he is beautiful! I was worried about being able to love another kid as much as I feel for shailee, but as soon as I saw him I can't believe how I love that little man. Exactly how I love my daughter. That feeling of selflessness and the urge to give everything you have no matter what it takes. The feeling of wanting to be a better person so you can be everything to them. All those feelings hit you at once as soon as you see your child being born and you want to grab your little one and never let go. When I was pregnant with ty I did not want to have another kid because of the pain, but as soon as I saw him I knew this wouldn't be my last. That emotional feeling when they are born is incredible and I would love to feel it over and over again. Maybe just one more time cause I don't know how many kids Jordan will let us have. ;) anyway, here is his story:

                                                                (8 months pregnant)

Pregnancy: I found out I was pregnant with Ty one week before easter.  I was not expecting it, Nuvaring doesn't work or I'm just highly fertile mertle. The night before I found out, Jordan, my sister Shyanne, and I had gone out for seafood. The next morning I was PUKING my guts.  I was late on my period and had taken a pregnancy test 2 days before and it said negative. So, I did happen to have another test in my drawer. I didnt think i was since the last tests results, but tried it anyway. Lo and behold it was screaming: PREGNANT. I felt empty. I didnt know how Jordan was going to react. I went in the room and said, um jordan, im pregnant. he was half asleep and said ok, lets talk in the morning. I think he was in shock. Next morning he looked at the test and he smiled. To my surprise, he was calm and happy. Him being that way put me at ease and I then got very excited. We both told everyone right away which might have been a bad idea. A week later Jordan proposed so everyone probably thought we were getting married because I was pregnant. Little did I know, he already had the ring when we found out. So, in the end it all worked out. When I was pregnant with Ty I never really threw up that much, I felt a little nauseated here and there, but overall it was a great pregnancy. Although I measured small I gained a lot more than I did with shailee. Weight before pregnancy was 113 and ending pregnancy weight was 134. 21 pound gain! Hello! Shailee was an 8 pound gain. Haha. So at the moment I'm feeling a little F-A-T. The only thing I could really complain about with this pregnancy is I already have a messed up back and this pregnancy made it worse, and I also live on the third floor. Sucked!  During pregnancy about 36 weeks into it, my doctor said I wasn't measuring right and wanted me to get an ultrasound right away. At the ultrasound he was measuring 3 weeks behind, his stomach being the smallest. He was in the 12 percintile. babies that go to the 10th percintile are sceduled for delivery immediately. We had to get the non stress test done every week and then another ultrasound at 39 weeks. At the 39 week and 3 days mark we did the ultrasound. He was still measuring 3 weeks behind but was in the 15th percentile, which is still tiny. The doctor said to wait to my due date to be induced but if I felt like I want or need to come in before then then I could. Jordan and I decided to wait and let the baby cook till he was ready or atleast till my due date.

Labor: the night before I got induced at about 830 I started to feel contractions that hurt and I could hardly walk through them. We had just got home from a couple family parties and I wasn't wanting to leave. I was exhausted. Luckily Jordan felt it was time and didnt give me a choice. We threw in the last few things needed in our bags and headed out the door. We dropped shailee off at my grandmas and headed to the hospital. Once we arrived and got in the room my contractions were about 2 minutes apart and hurt like hell. I was dilated at a 3 so the nurse (who was awesome) went and called my doctor. She comes back and says your doctor isn't available until 6 this morning so dr gourley is on call. Dr gourley was the guy who delivered shailee. He made me super uncomfortable and last time wanted me to wait an hour before getting an epidural when I was in so much pain. Well guess what!? He did it again. He told the nurse to tell me to wait an hour to see if I was really in labor. Hmm, lets just say for the second time-- that didnt go over very well. I through the biggest fit and started bawling my eyes out. I'm getting induced tomorrow and I'm a 3 dilation and you want to see if I'm in labor- plus it's my due date? NOT GONNA HAPPEN. The nurse felt bad so she checked me again and within a half hour I was at a 3.5. She called the doctor again and lucky me, I got the epidural. Sometimes it pays off to be a bi---. ;) freakin a. Anyway, so I got the epidural. Which only was working on half of my body the whole time. I would switch from side to side constantly trying to get it to the other side.

Delivery: This part will be very short. The doctor came in about 4:10 and i was ready to roll. I started pushing at 4:18 & out came baby Ty at 4:20. YES- two minutes of pushing. (applause) thank you, thank you. :) That is what makes this paragraph so short. There wasn't too much to explain here. ha. Jordan, to my surprise actually watched the birthing process and I think he is glad he did. I'm sure he had the same feelings I did when our little angel came to us. And surprisingly didn't look so small.... 7 pounds 2 oz and 20 inches long born at 4:20 am on his due date: December 10, 2012. Why he was measuring small on the ultrasound was beyond me. He is tiny, but not as tiny as they thought. Little bugger. He was born two days before my birthday and was the best birthday gift I could of ever asked for.

I am so thankful that Heavenly Father has sent me Ty and his daddy. They have been the two biggest blessings for me this year. Jordan has been such a light in my life since the day I met him, and he makes me want to be a better person, mom, and wife. He is so special to me, and I'm so glad my Heavenly Father brought us together and gave us a beautiful baby boy. I'm so grateful that Shailee is apart of our family and she has been such a good big sister. She is a reminder to me everyday of how at one point in my life I was weak and she made me stronger and I can get through anything. She has always been the best part of my day and makes me try and better myself everyday. I love my family so much & wouldnt know what to do without every single one of them. Ty being born has been the biggest reminder to me of how important family and the church is. They are the two essential parts of my life that I have taken for granted at some points in my life. He has made me thankful for everything I have. I love you Ty Raby. Thank you for coming into my life.

Shailee Peyton Kirkpatrick {a birthing story}

Since I am 39 weeks pregnant and sooo ready to be done, I've been thinking a lot about Shailee's Birth and how that whole process went. Will it be the same or will it be completely different? I wanted to post a blog about my labor and delivery experience with her.  So i can look back and read how alike or different they were. Also this will keep me entertained for a bit. 

(6 months pregnant with Shailee)

Pregnancy: My pregnancy with Shailee was super hard on my body.  My starting weight with Shailee was 112 pounds At 6 months pregnant I had gotten down to about 104 pounds. Ending weight was 120 pounds. Only an 8 pound gain with that stinker.  I threw up from Day one until the day she was born. Constantly Sick.  I remember at one point i couldnt even contain water and had to be in the hospital to get my fluids. She was taking EVERYTHING from me. (still does) :) 

(Let me add that I looked like hell at midnight) 

Labor: My due date with Shailee was March 2nd 2010. During the whole pregnancy I was either working, throwing up, or lying in bed. I was so sick and depressed all the time with her, being a single mother at the time didn't help. On February 27th I finally decided I needed to get my butt out of bed and go walking. I walked around 3 different malls, over 15 different stores, and I was so exhausted by the time I got home. That was the first time I had actually got out of the house besides work. I don't know if that is what actually put me into labor or if I was just close to my due date anyway, but that night at 11:00 i started feeling pain. I had not had one contraction or even a braxton hick with Shailee until this night. The pain was small and I had just thought it was because I walked my self for 10 hours straight. So I didn't time them.  I started to drift off to sleep and then I felt the worst pain I had ever felt in my entire life! Midnight exactly is when my major labor pains began. I started freaking out and demanded someone to take me to the hospital right then. It felt like someone was taking a knife to my back and then grinding it from the back to the front of my stomach constantly. When we got to the hospital the nurses said they had to wait and watch me for an hour to see if this was real labor. After I heard that I think i broke the world record for the most swear words said in a short period of time. I was screaming and swearing in so much pain and they wanted to wait an hour!?!? um, NO. About 5 minutes later everything started to go white. I could not see anything. I knew I was about to pass out because of the pain.  About 5 minutes after that the nurse said ok lets get her an epidural. haha. So much for an hour, suckers. ;) I don't recall there being any pain from the epidural just because my contractions were so bad. As soon as that epidural was in, I was in heaven. I was the sweetest thing you've ever seen. I was laughing and having fun at that point. I liked that I couldn't pick up my legs and someone had to do it for me. I couldn't feel anything, It was wonderful. 

Delivery: It took me about 10 hours to get dialated to what I needed to be. They broke my water at about 8:00 and at 10:30 am it was time to push. I couldn't feel if I was pushing, but they said I was doing it perfectly so I guess I must have been. I pushed for 21 minutes with a tear (glad I was numb) and at 10:51 out came my precious little angel. I didn't cry, I was in shock. I think the first thing I said was OH MY GOSH. It was unreal that this little baby just came out of me. After they dried her off I started to tear up a bit, but that moment is so unreal, its not something I could take in at that moment. But everyone else in the room was bawling their eyes out. Now when I watch the video of her being born I cry my eyes out, but could not in the moment. I still am in shock that I gave birth and am about to do it again!  She was 7 pounds 11 oz and 19 1/2 inches long. And PERFECT! She had such beautiful skin and color. A little yellow, but she had a mild case of jaundice. Now that I look back, for the 1/2 hour-hour of pain that I had with contractions my delivery was pretty easy, and she was born 2 days early. Good thing, cause I am so impatient. I am anticipating what this one will be like. 

As for now, just time to wait..................................................................

More Pictures Of Shailee's Birth: